SOURCE: Dr. Tseday Aberra

April 22, 2008 14:03 ET

Using Sex as a Weapon and the Other Six Biggest Mistakes Married Women Make; Leading Authority on Marriage and Relationships Dr. Tseday Aberra Tells Women What NOT to Do

LOS ANGELES, CA--(Marketwire - April 22, 2008) - Have you ever withheld sex from your husband to get what you want? Think again, according to top marriage and relationship expert Dr. Tseday Aberra. According to Dr. Aberra, a clinical psychologist, there are seven mistakes that women will typically make at one point or another during the course of their marriage.

"Most of the women who come to me with marital problems have, at one point or another, made all of these mistakes during their marriage," said Dr. Aberra. "It is critical for women to change their way of thinking in each of these areas."

The seven mistakes women typically make in a marriage:

1. Using sex as a weapon: The biggest no-no ever! A faithful husband has no choice but to come to you for sex. He doesn't like being reminded of his vulnerability; it's hurtful and will create feelings of anger and resentment. Find another way to solve your problem.

2. Keeping score: Most women have the uncanny ability to recall the time and place of every mistake their husband has ever made and bring past errors to the forefront to win arguments. Stay away from bringing up his mistakes over and over again; scorekeeping is not an endearing quality.

3. Demanding to know everything: You don't have the right to know everything he thinks about or does, unless it's about your marriage. If you need to know everything, you're insecure about yourself and your marriage.

4. Nagging all day: He clearly understands what you want. And he's capable of making a decision about what he wants to do. You're not going to get what you want by nagging so cut-it out.

5. Fighting unfairly: This quality is more common in women than in men. A woman's tendency is to personalize fights, making it difficult to have fair and necessary marital arguments. Productive disagreements need to be kept within the context of the marriage and the issue at-hand.

6. Latching: Even if you enjoy each other's company, he still wants to have time without you. It's necessary. Time without you doesn't mean he doesn't love you. Don't take it personally. It's rather healthy.

7. Throwing a fit over his spending: Most men shop for themselves a couple of times a year and their spending seems excessive because they do their shopping all at once. You, on the other hand, don't appear to spend much because you shop more frequently.

Dr. Tseday Aberra is a clinical and forensic psychologist and one of the country's leading authorities on the male-female relationship. Dr. Aberra advocates a unique and at times controversial approach to the dynamics of marriage, the elements necessary for a successful relationship and the role of sex in a marriage. Dr. Aberra has a successful private practice in the greater Los Angeles area, written numerous articles on the subject and conducted seminars across the country reaching countless people seeking to improve their relationships and marriages. More information is available at

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